Catastrophe

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This is where you will remember me, in rain, thunder and lightning.

This is where I hope to forget. This is where I wish the storm would take away all the hurt.

This is where I’ll leave you. This is where I hope the growl of thunder will wake you up to the reality that you lost me

Here.This is where I’ll finally allow the current to wash all traces of you from me. I’ll come clean, ready for a fresh start.

and when I start again, I promise, not even a single thought of you will make me quiver. You will mean nothing to me anymore.

I promise you, that once I decide to let go, there’s no looking back. You will be but a mere memory, a lesson learned.

I’ll close my doors from the past so you can’t come back. I swear you’ll regret this. You’ll regret not loving me enough.

I’ll give myself the love you didn’t allow me to have. I won’t regret this. I won’t regret choosing myself this time.

I will love myself like how I loved you because I deserve that kind of love. The kind of love that is pure and unconditional

And I guess, when we look at it now, this love we tried to make real, was a disaster waiting to happen all along.

Like karma, you will remember me in lightning. As it strikes you with what ifs and flashbacks from the past

As thunder rolls, slower than the speed of light, you will realize that you’re not getting me back. You finally lost me.

When it rains,the raindrops will remind you of the tears I shed countless times and you’ll realize how much this girl loved you
but by then I already survived the storm.

 

(a collab)

Marvels of a something

eka

Someone once told me that I was his home then he left. I wonder if he felt homeless since then.

Someone once told me that he’ll be waiting. I wonder how those words tasted to him.

Someone once told me that I was his number one. I wonder if he really knew how to count

Someone once called me his life. I wonder how many more breaths he took as he walked away.

Someone once called me his strength. I wonder how many battles he lost as he turned his back on me

Someone once told me he loved me. I wonder if he meant it.

I wonder if I am worth fighting for or worth loving. I wonder if I am even worth it.

I wonder if I am worth the risk, all the hassle. I wonder if you would have really jumped into that void just to get to me.

I wonder if you will also promise me the moon and stars. I wonder if you even see me worth promising wonderful things to

I wonder if you still believe in keeping promises. I’ve been so used to watching them get broken so easily.

I wonder if this time it will be different. I wonder if these promises will be fulfilled. I wonder if you’re different

I wonder if you’re like the ones I still keep wondering about. I hope not. I hope you ARE different. I hope to stop wondering.

 

(A collab)